sorry i’m late, professor. im disenchanted with the human experience and waking up every morning thrusts me into an instant existential crisis
get to know me meme : 1/5 musicians
"I want to provoke people with thoughts, not by taking my clothes off. It’s time to move on from Stripperville."
100,000 notes and I wonder how many people realise this line was improvised by a 7 year old
"oh!, there’s a very pleasant side to you,
a side I much prefer, it’s one that…
laughs and jokes around…”
bury me with this version hah
why couldn’t i be born with an older brother who is my best friend and has hot friends that flirt with me and drives me places like mcdonalds when im sad and punches rude boys in the face for me.
My brother once sat on me and farted until I passed out
my brother duct taped me to a treadmill and turned it to the highest setting once
when I was four my brother locked me in a ferret cage for an hour on Christmas Eve
My brother once grabbed me by my feet, carried me outside upside down and lowered me into the dustbin until I gave him the remote so that he could turn the kids tv shows off
Can we please just all take a moment and think about how snails are the cUTEST FUCKING THING I HAVE EVER SEEN. HOLY SHIT.
march of the noot noots